Baby Too Soon
by miissnoname
Summary: Riley finds out she is pregnant. So, I decided to move it from my Rucas one-shots to it's own story because I added onto it.
1. Chapter 1

It's Monday evening and Maya and I are pacing my bedroom, my heart ready to explode. How did I get here? I'm a senior in high school, a few months away from graduation. I shouldn't be in this situation. We were always safe, at least that's what I thought. The two minutes seem to never end, but soon the buzzer goes off on my phone. Maya and I look at each other.

I slowly walk over my desk and pick up the little stick. I can feel my heart rate increase by the second. My eyes slowly look down, and that's when I see two little pink lines staring back at me. I slowly walk over to the bay window not once looking up. I can hear Maya voice, but not her words.

"Riles," she shakes my shoulders, and I'm shake my head softly.

"I'm, I'm pregnant," I whisper. "What am I going to do? I'm still in high school with college right around the corner."

"There are other options," she says in a hush tone.

I shake my head, "No. I can't. This is my baby. Mine and Lucas'," my eyes widen. "Lucas. What about him? What if he doesn't want this baby? What if he leaves?" Maya laughs, "This isn't finny!"

"Sorry I thought you were joking," she looks at me, and I roll my eyes. "Oh, you're serious. You don't realize how much he loves you, do you? Huckleberry is nuts about you. Don't even get me started on the way he stares at you like you're this goddess sent from above."

I giggle softly as tears form in my eyes, "I'm scared, Maya." She drapes her arm around my shoulder and pulls me closer.

"It'll be okay. But you do need to tell Lucas. Your parents too," my eyes widen, "but I would start with Lucas."

"Riley?" I hear my dad yell from the hallway, and I shove the pregnancy test behind my back just as he walks in.

"Yes, dad?"

He looks at me, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." I blink back a few tears before they can fall.

"Mrs. Benison from down the hall is on the phone, she wants know if you can babysit Caroline this Saturday."

I nod, "Yeah, that's fine."

"Okay, well I'll go ahead and tell her." My dad leaves the room, and I reach to grab the stick.

My eyes stay glued to it, "I'm really pregnant."

"You are," Maya says, "But you aren't alone. You'll have me, Lucas, your parents. It'll be okay."I let it all soak in. This is real. I'm going to have a baby.

The rest of the week I do whatever I can to avoid everyone, but mostly Lucas. I'm scared to see him because I know I'll let it spill, and despite what Maya said I don't know how he is going to react. I'm scared that I'll lose him, so for now I'll pretend like nothing is going on.

Saturday comes, and I walk over to the Benison's apartment. I'm actually excited to watch Caroline, she is just the cutest two-year-old. I lift my hand to knock on the door and a few second later a tall blonde brown eyed man opens the door.

"Riley, come in," he steps back making room for me to walk inside.

"Hi, Mr. Benison," I look around, "Where's Caroline?"

"She's right here," I turn to see Mrs. Benison wearing a black knee length dress holding Caroline on her hip.

"Ri-ey!" Caroline shouts and Mrs. Benison sets her down and she runs to me.

I lift her up and spin, "Hi sweet Caroline."

Mrs. Benison laughs walking over, "She loves you. We'll be-" she looks at the open door, and Mr. Benison and I follow her gaze.

"Luke!" Caroline wiggles out of my grasp, and runs towards Lucas and he picks her up.

"Hi Caroline," he laughs and looks up, "Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Benison."

"I didn't know you'd be helping Riley tonight," Mr. Benison says.

"I just needed to tell her something, but I can leave," he pulls Caroline off him and sets her on the ground.

Mr. Benison and Mrs. Benison laugh, "No it's fine. Come in. Caroline seems to have taken a liking to you to," Mrs. Benison says.

Mr. Benison picks Caroline up and gives her a kiss as does Mrs. Benison, "We love you. Be good for Riley and Lucas," Mrs. Benison says and Mr. Benison sets her down.

"You two be good too," Mr. Benison teases Lucas and me.

"Of course," I say as Lucas laughs.

Mr. Benison walks out with Mrs. Benison right behind. "Oh," she turns around, "she already ate, but might want a snack. We'll be back around ten. If you need to get a hold of us, we have both of our phones. She might stay up a little later than normal, since someone here put her down for her nap late and let her sleep longer than usual," she looks at Mr. Benison and he laughs.

After they leave, Caroline runs to her room and I try to follow her, but Lucas pulls me back.

"Why have you been ignoring me?" he asks.

I tilt my head slightly, "I haven't. I've been busy with my senior portfolio, and studying for my physics final. You know how much I struggle with science."

His eyes drop, "And that's how I know your avoiding me. That's the one subject I always help you in. Ar-are you going to break up with me?" he stutters.

My eyes widen, and I cup his face, "Lucas Friar, I am not breaking up with you!" I say forcefully. "You're one of the best things to ever happen to me," I drop my hands and wrap my arms around his neck, "I love you."

He blushes slightly, he always does when I say those three little words, "Will you talk to me about what's bothering you?"

I sigh, "I will just not right now. Right now, we are supposed to be babysitting." I move to pull away, but he pulls me closer.

"I love you, too," he presses his lips against mine, and I melt into his arms. We pull away slowly when we here a thump coming from Caroline's room, Lucas sprints to her with me right behind him.

When I finally reach her room, I see Lucas on his knees with her little arms wrapped around him. I hear Caroline's soft cries as Lucas sooths her.

"She hit her head on her table."

I walk over and get down to their level, "Are you okay, Caroline?" I ask rubbing her back.

"Sweet Caroline," she sniffles and I laugh lightly.

"Of course, are you okay sweet Caroline?" she nods. She slowly unlatches herself from Lucas.

"We play?" Lucas and I nod, and she smiles. She runs around her room grabbing her favorite stuffed animals; a giraffe, an elephant, and frog that is the biggest of the three.

She hands Lucas the elephant, me the giraffe, and she keeps the frog for herself. Lucas started helping me babysit her a few months ago, and she gives us the same animals each time. We sit around her tea table and I chuckle to myself every time I see Lucas sitting in the little chair.

He doesn't know that I was listening to the talk Auggie gave him about not hurting me. I was leaning on the wall besides the door and I peaked in so I can get one look at Lucas.

We pretend we're the animals having a tea party. I don't know how we started doing this, but it's the first thing we do whether it's the three of us, or just me and Caroline. When she gets too excited, it's hard to understand her; however, it's extremely adorable. We play this for an hour when I hear my phone ring from the living room, and I excuse myself to go and answer it.

 ** _Hello?_**

 _Riles, have you told him?_

 ** _Shh! He's in the other room._**

Maya laughs. _We're on the phone and in a different room from Huckleberry; he isn't going to hear anything._

 ** _He thought I was going to break up with him. Can you believe that?_** I hear a sigh come from her.

 _I can. You've been going out of your way and ignoring him. You can't pretend anymore, you need to tell him. He deserves to know._

"AAAAH! Ri-ey help!" Caroline laughs as she runs into the living room with Lucas chasing after her and I laugh.

 ** _Maya, I have to go._** I chuckle.

 _Tell him._

 ** _I will. Bye peaches._** I hang up the phone and place it down on the table.

I watch as Lucas chases her around the sofa pretending to be a monster, and her laughter fills the apartment. I can't help but think of how great of a day he's going to be. I always pictures Lucas and I having a future together and him being the father to my children; the children part is just going to happen a lot sooner than I had hoped for.

Caroline runs up to me, wraps her arms around my leg, and sticks her tongue out at Lucas, "You can't get me. Ri-ey safe!"

Lucas laughs, "She is. Riley won't let anything happen to you," he looks at me and smiles.

I run my hand over her head, "Do you want a snack?" she nods. "Okay, c'mon." She grabs my hand, and we walk to the kitchen.

I move to the refrigerator and grab an applesauce pouch. She loves these. Lucas picks her up and set her down on one of the stools, and I hand her the pouch. I cut up two apples for Lucas and I and grab the caramel dip. The two of them talk amongst each other, and I'm so in awe by the two of them that I can't focus on what is being said.

"Are you okay?" Lucas laughs as he asks me.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I smile. I look at the time that displays on the oven, "Caroline," I look at her just as she yawns, "I think it's time for bed," she nods tiredly, and I turn to Lucas, "Do you mind putting her down, she's already in her pajamas, I just need to clean up here?"

He shakes his head, "Not at all." He stands up and grabs her, "Say goodnight to Riley."

"Night Ri-ey," she waves at me with a smile on her face over Lucas shoulders. I wash the few dishes that I dirtied and wipe down the counters so it isn't sticky.

After fifteen minutes, I'm moving down the hall to her room. I can hear Lucas' voice and butterflies awake in my stomach. His reading brown bear, brown bear, what do you see? Her favorite. It's a short book, but reading it with her makes it longer. Every animal she has to tell whoever is readying it to her how the animal is her favorite and why.

When I get to her door, I stand in doorway and watch them. Caroline is trying her best to stay away, but I don't think she'll make it to the end of the book.

"Back sheep, black sheep, what do you see?" Lucas reads, and just like I predicted Caroline has fallen asleep. He laughs and slowly gets lifts himself off her bed making sure not to wake him. He sets the book down on the dresser. "Goodnight Caroline, have sweet dreams just like you," he whispers stroking her hair and my heart warms with happiness.

It's not just the two of us sitting on the couch. I don't know why I'm so nervous right now, but I am. My heart is beating a mile per minute. He clears his throat, and I look at him, "You've been in Rileytown all evening," he says with a slight smirk.

"How?"

"You've been staring at me and Caroline. Are you thinking of the future we're going to have someday?" A blush washes over me, and he laughs. "You don't have to be embarrassed, I think about it all the time," he grabs my hand interlocking our fingers.

"How did I get so lucky?" I say staring into his eyes.

He laughs, "I think I'm the lucky one, but we can agree to disagree," we both laugh.

"Lucas, I need to tell you something."

"What is it?" curiosity fills his voice.

I take a deep breath and exhale. I open my mouth, but the front door opens. Mr. and Mrs. Benison are home early from their night out. I tell them about Caroline's little accident, but Lucas assures the two that she was okay. We talk for a few minutes and they thank us for watching Caroline, before Lucas and I leave.

Once we are out in the hallway, I look at Lucas, "Do you want to go to the roof and talk?"

"I'll never say no to talking to you," he smiles coyly at me, and my heart flutters.

Once we're up there, he moves to sit on the bench but I walk over to the edge and look out into the city. I need to tell him, but I'm scared of what's going to happen between us.

"Riles," I feel his arms wrap around me from behind, and I lean into his body, "What's on your mind?"

"Lucas, I'm," I turn around to face him. I open my mouth to finish, but the word doesn't come out. I try three times, but nothing comes out. My face drops, but he lifts my head up and gazes into my eyes.

"Whatever it is, you can tell me. I'm not going anywhere. No matter what."

I take a deep breath, "I'm pregnant," I whisper as my eyes move to the ground. His breath hitches, and I wait for him to say something, but he doesn't. "I don't know how this happened, I thought we were safe. I understand if you don't-"

"Stop right there," he cuts me off. "I'm not going anywhere. Yeah, I'm shocked right now, but that doesn't mean I'm going to run away from this," his grip around me tightens, "I love you, and I'm going to be there." Tears starts to form in my eyes. "Is that why you were watching me with Caroline?"

I nod, "You're going to make an amazing dad," he smiles. I take a deep breath, "Lucas, I'm scared."

"So am I. The timing isn't ideal, but it'll be okay. We'll be okay. There are a lot of things that we are going to have to figure out, but we will." I bury my face into the crock of his neck. Silence surrounds us and for the time being everything feel like it's going to be okay.

I pull away slowly, "I just don't know how this happened."

He smirks, "I have an idea," he pauses and I search my mind. He waits for it to click for me, but it doesn't. "Remember last month, when I borrowed my dad's truck? You wanted to go star gazing, so we drove out of the city for night and laid in the back-"

Everything clicks, "And things got carried away," I cut him off, and he smirks with a wink.

We stay on the roof a little bit longer talking about everything. We move over to the bench. He wraps his arm around me, and I lean into him. We're trying to figure out what we are going to do about college, how we're going to raise the baby. Then it comes the topic I've been dreading most; how are we going to tell our parents.

"When do you want to tell them?" he asks hesitantly.

I take a deep breath, "Tomorrow. Keeping this a secret for a week was hard enough. I don't think I can do it much longer." I look up at him, "Who are you most scared to tell?"

"Your dad. I'm going to lose a lot more than a shoe," we both laugh, but that quickly fades. I know he's scared, I'm scared. We're both young.

"Lucas, are we being unrealistic about this? I mean this is a baby. It's going to be hard. Our parents are going to disappointed in us, college is going to be difficult. Life was hard, but this is just going to make it even more difficult."

Lucas takes a deep breath, "Maybe we are, but we'll get through everything. This child is going to test a lot of things for us, like our relationship. But we just have to stick together."

"I love you, Lucas."

"And I love you," he kisses the top of my head, "Everything is going to be fine. I promise."


	2. Chapter 2

_So, I always planned to write a part two to this one, but I didn't expect for it to turn out like this. I hope you like it._

* * *

I'm standing in front of my body length mirror looking down at my unbuttoned pants; I could have sworn these fit me a few days ago. I groan as I try once more to button them up, but I give up quickly when I realize it's no use. I hear rustling behind me and turn to see Lucas climbing in through the bay window.

"I think I might need new clothes," I sigh.

He walks closer to me kissing my forehead softly. "I think it's time we tell your parents." I don't say anything. I walk over to my closet kicking off my jeans. I grab a pair of leggings and quickly slide them up, and pull out my flowy blouse that got caught inside. Lucas takes a few steps towards me, "Riley, I don't know how much longer you think we can hide this. We were supposed to tell them months ago."

I still don't say anything. I walk back to my mirror and grab my brush and start running it through my hair. I stare at my reflection, and I catch Lucas staring at me. A warily smile on his lips. "I think I can hide it for another month or two," I say a little under my breath. I feel Lucas wrap his arms around me, and I melt into his hold. His hands move to my stomach, and the butterflies awake.

"I don't think you can." He slowly slides up the bottom on my blouse, and I see my small baby bump. "You're showing more and more every day. You can't keep hiding it behind loose shirts and dresses."

"I know," I whisper. "But, but…" I stop. I wiggle out his hold and walk over to the foot of my bed, slumping myself down.

He follows my lead, "What's wrong?"

I fidget with my fingers. "I just, I had all intentions on telling them the day after I told you. But, when I came home that day, I just I couldn't. I can't have them look at me with disappointment in their eyes." I can feel the tears filling my eyes, and soon a small cry escapes.

Lucas pulls me into his arms, running his fingers through my hair. After a few minutes of him soothing me, he tilts my head so I'm looking at me. "I made you a promised that night on the roof. Do you remember?"

I nod my head softly, and he thumbs away my tears. "You promised me everything will be okay," I say quietly.

"And I meant it." He grabs my hand and holds it to his lips, placing a soft tender kiss.

"You're thirteen week pregnant," he lets go of my hand, and pulls out his wallet. I watch as he pulls something out. "I want everyone to know about our baby," he says staring down at a picture of my last sonogram.

"Yo-you carry the picture around with you?" I sniffle.

He smirks. "Of course, I do. Along with a picture of you, and soon there's going to be a picture of the three of us together." My eyes start welling up with more tears, but this time they're from joy. "Like I said that night, the time isn't ideal, but we have to make do with it. You and I are going to be parents, Riley."

I inhale deeply, "Tomorrow, after graduation we tell them? Your parents can come here, that way we can tell yours and mine at the same time, or we can go to your house," I suggest.

He shakes his head, "Here is fine, and no backing out." I swallow the lump in my throat, and try to steady my breathing. I feel Lucas pull me closer. "It's going to be okay," he whispers near my ear and places a peck on my temple. I really hope he's right.

* * *

Throughout the graduation ceremony, my heart is pounding so rapidly against my chest; I can hear it in my ears. I'm trying my best to focus, but my mind is elsewhere. I'm scared. I spend the entire time trying to prepare myself for what's going to happened after, so much, that I almost miss my name being called.

I walk across the stage and shake the principal's hand as he hands me my diploma. At the end of the stage, is a row of teachers, including my dad. I shake all their hands, and when I get to my dad, I feel myself grow more anxious with nerves.

"Riley, I'm so proud of you!" My dad looks at our shaking hands, "Your hand is sweating," he starts chuckling. "Pumpkin, you don't have to be nervous. You walked across the stage and didn't trip," he jokes as he pulls me into a hug. I laugh nervously not saying anything, and walk off stage returning to my seat. If only he knew the real reason I'm nervous.

After the ceremony, Lucas quickly finds me. He dips me into a passionate kiss. "We did it!" he exclaims breaking from the kiss. A small giggle escapes from my lips.

I look around the crowded gym, and see Maya with her parents, Zay with his, Farkle and Smackle together with theirs. It doesn't take long for my family and Lucas' to find us. Hugs are being passed around between all of us, and everyone tells me and Lucas congratulations.

"Mrs. Friar, Mr. Friar," I shift my gaze between the two of them, "my mom is making a graduation dinner tonight, and I know Lucas is going to come and…and," nervous start to fill the pit of my stomach, "I would really li-like if you guys came as well."

Mrs. Friar smiles, "We'd be delighted sweetie. What time should we be there?"

"Six o'clock," my mom says from over my shoulder.

"Well, we'll see you then," Mr. Friar chuckles. He looks at Lucas, "Son, are you going to be with us until then or are you leaving with Riley?" Everyone laughs.

Lucas walks over to me and drapes his arm around my shoulder, "Dad, was that question really necessary," Lucas says playfully.

After many pictures, Lucas and I tell our parents that we were going to go to Topanga's with our friends, since Smackle and Farkle were both leaving tomorrow to start summer classes at Princeton. We wanted one last time where we can all be together before things were to hectic, you know with school, jobs…a baby.

* * *

When we get to Topanga's everyone else is already there in their usual seats. I walk over sitting next to Maya and make room for Lucas, leaving me in the middle.

"You're still alive, so I'm guessing you haven't told Mr. Matthews," Zay jokes as soon as we take our seats. Lucas tenses up, trying to cover up by laughing nervously. I know he is just as scared as I am about telling out parents. "Hey man, I was just joking."

Lucas shakes his head, "What? Yeah I know that." I grab his hand and draw small circles in his palm.

"So, when are guys going to tell Hambone?" Farkle inquires.

I clear my throat, "At dinner. Lucas' parents are coming over, and we're going to tell them."

"Maybe it won't be so bad," Smackle says trying to comfort us.

Maya laughs, "Matthews basically chased Huckleberry out of class when they had their first kiss. Now, Hop-a-Long here went and got Riles pregnant." She snickers, "It's going to be bad."

"Maya!" I shout.

"What? I'm just being honest here."

Lucas and I interlock our fingers. We know it's going to be bad, but hearing it from someone else only confirms it. Lucas and I listen to the rest of them chit chat amongst themselves, and I try to engage, but it's safe to say my mind is elsewhere.

Before I know it a couple of hours pass by, Farkle and Smackle are telling us goodbye. Lucas and I take that time to say goodbye as well and go for a walk, just the two of us.

We walk to a nearby park, hand in hand. We don't talk much. I think we're both thinking about what's about to happen in the next hour or so; I know I am. I'm terrified of what my parents are going to think and say, as well as Lucas' parents. The last thing I want them to think is that I ruined Lucas' life. I couldn't bare if they didn't like me.

"What's going on in that beautiful head of yours?" Lucas asks pulling me out of my own head.

I sigh deeply. "Everything," I say quietly. I clear my throat, "Lucas," I stop to look at him, "can't we wait a little longer to tell them. Please."

Lucas inhales and slowly exhales. "We can't." He caresses my face, "We have to tell them. It isn't going to make a difference whether we tell them today, tomorrow, or two weeks from now. You're pregnant, and waiting isn't going to change that."

"I know," I whisper. "So, are you ready to tell them?"

Lucas chuckles lightly, "Not at all. I can only imagine what yours parents are going to think." His phones goes off, and he pulls it out of his pocket, reading a text. I watch as he rolls his eyes.

"Who is it?" I ask.

"Just Zay, making sure I was still alive" He looks at his phone and sighs. "We should head over. We're already late." I nod my head slowly, and my heart starts to pick up speed. "It's going to be okay, as long as we have each other." He grabs my hand, and pulls me in the direction of my apartment, and anxiousness start to consume me.

* * *

I take a deep breath before reaching for the door knob, not yet twisting it. Lucas places a comforting hand on my arm, and I look at him. Our eyes lock, and he doesn't have to say it's going to okay because his eyes are saying that for him. I walk inside with Lucas behind me and see mine and Lucas' parents laughing and talking in the kitchen, and all I can think is how that is going to disappear soon.

Lucas and I slowly walk across the room to the table taking a seat. I sit next to my mom, and Lucas sit directly across from my dad. My dad is sitting in his usual place, as well as my mom, and Mr. and Mrs. Friar are sitting across from my mom.

"You two are finally here," my mom says.

"Yeah sorry we took so long," I start. "I guess we lost track of time."

"That's okay. Why don't you two come join us. Auggie went to the movies with Dewey and Ava, so it's just the six of us," my mom says standing up from the table and walking over to the stove to check the food.

"So, did you two have fun with the rest of the clique?" Mrs. Friar asks.

"Yeah, we always try to have fun when we're all together," Lucas says keeping it as short as he can. He reaches for my hand, and I can feel his sweaty palms or maybe they're mine. His green eyes find mine, and I give him a soft smile. I look between all of them, and once again my heart starts racing.

I watch as Mrs. Friar gets up to help my mom serve the plates, and my dad and Mr. Friar are talking amongst themselves.

"So, when's a good time to tell them?" Lucas whispers, and I shrug my shoulders as I pick off the light blue nail polish from my nails, having doubts once again about telling them. "No, no, no. We are doing this. We have to."

"Have to what sweetie?" Mrs. Friar ask reaching over us and placing a plate in front of me and then Lucas.

Lucas coughs, "Oh, uhm, nothing."

Mrs. Friar laughs. "Is it a surprise? I like surprises."

"Do you have a surprise for us?" My mom asks taking a seat as she sets a plate down in front of my dad and herself, and Mrs. Friar does the same for her and Mr. Friar.

Lucas glance over at Lucas, and I nervously shift in my seat. "I…I guess you can say that," he says.

"Well, what is it?" My dad presses.

"I…I," I stutter. "We should eat first," I insist.

"I agree with Riley," Lucas chimes in, and no one opposes the idea.

The rest of the dinner, our parents talk to one another; and Lucas and I sit idly by, and I'm perfectly fine with it. I take a few bites of my food, but I am way too nervous to eat; and it doesn't go unnoticed by my mom.

I look up, and her eyes are locked on. "Riley, are you sure you're okay?"

"I, yeah." I mumble. I watch as my mom looks over at Lucas, and he squirms in his seat. I focus back on my plate moving the food around.

"Something is definitely up," Mrs. Friar says. I glance up quickly, and both our moms are looking at us while our dads are oblivious to what's going on.

"Spill it," my mom almost demands.

I feel a lump in my throat, and no matter how much I try to swallow it back; it doesn't disappear. I grab my glass of water and take a slip. My heart is beating rapidly in my chest, and I feel myself warming up with nerves. "I…I," I shake my head, "I'm, uhm," I can't say it. My gaze shifts to Lucas, and he grabs my hand.

He pulls his attention away from me and moves his eyes between our parents. He takes a deep breath, "Riley is pre-pregnant." The words tumble out of his mouth and my grip around his hand tightens.

Silence immediately outtakes the room. I slowly turn my head, and their eyes are all on me. No one is saying anything. I feel the pressure on, and my eyes start to well in tears. I do everything I can to keep them from sliding down my cheek.

"Is this a joke?" My dad says with a slight snicker. "This is a joke, right?" His eyes are glued onto me and Lucas, and I slowly drop my head.

"It's not, sir," I hear Lucas say. I'm too afraid to look up.

"You got my eighteen-year-old daughter pregnant?!" My dad shouts. I listen to his chair scrape against the floor, and I look up in time to see my mom standing up in front of him stopping him for whatever he might do next.

"Riley, how did you let this happen?" My mom looks at me, and it's what I feared most; disappointment in her eyes. "We trusted you."

I look up for a second trying to push the tears back, "I didn't mean for this to happen. I'm sorry," my voice starts to break. I turn my focus to Mr. and Mrs. Friar who have not said a single word, "I am so sorry," a tear trickles out, and I use my free hand to wipe it away. But that one tear, breaks the barrier and the rest come rushing out.

"I'm not," Lucas says his voice a little shaky. I look at him, and he reaches over to wipe my tears away. "The timing sucks," he looks at his parents, then mine, and back to me, "but it's happening." Lucas turns in the direction of my parents, "The night Riley told me I was a wreck. I tried to be strong for her and not show her how much I was freaking out, because I was. I was going over everything in my head. What are we going to do? College? Are we going to live together?" He takes a deep breath. "Me and Riley have talked about it, and maybe we're being naïve about it, but I know that I want to be with Riley, and I want this baby." He slowly exhales.

I look at my parents who are trying to digest everything Lucas just said, I'm trying to digest everything he just said. My mom redirects her line of view to the Friars, "How are you two calm right now?"

Mr. and Mrs. Friar look at each other, and then at Lucas; he slowly nods. "Well, we knew," Mrs. Friar says.

My eyes widen, "You told your parents!" I look at Lucas and the rise in my voice was more than I had intended. Lucas is startled by my outburst, but I can't believe he told his parents.

"Riley, I," Lucas starts, but is quickly cut off by Mr. Friar.

"The boy talks in his sleep." He looks at my parents and then to me. "He started mumbling things about a baby and Riley in his sleep. It was going on for about a week before his mother and I comforted him. At first, he played dumb, but he has never been a very good liar. It didn't take him long for him to spill everything."

Mr. Friar stands up, "Mr. and Mrs. Matthews, I understand what you are feeling right now. When I found out, I was furious. I told Lucas that his future was ruined," he looks at Lucas and smiles, and then back to my parents, "but my son told me his future was now only brighter. Lucas loves Riley, and I know Riley loves my son. They made a mistake, and this one came with consequences; but these two," he gestures towards me and Lucas not tearing his gaze from my parents, "don't view it as a consequence. I think they see it as a blessing." Lucas glances at me and I do the same. He takes a hold of my hand making small circles with his thumb.

"Yes, they are young and have a whole future ahead of them, just now a baby is going to be a part of it. I have stood outside Lucas' bedroom listening to the two of them talk since finding out Riley is pregnant, and I think they are going to be just fine."

I watch Mrs. Friar stand up and walk behind Mr. Friar, "My husband and I have had more time to process it, and we should have come to you as parents when we found out; and for that I, we apologize, but Lucas begged us not to, and I felt that Riley should be the one to tell you."

I wait for my parents to say something, anything, but silence is all I get. I slowly pull my hand out from Lucas and push myself up from my seat. I take a seat towards them, and my heart is ready to jump out of my chest. "M-mom. Dad," I say in a hushed tone. It takes them a second for both to look at me.

My mom clear her throat, "Mr. and Mrs. Friar I don't mean to be rude, but I think we need to speak with Riley alone. So, if you wouldn't mind."

"Oh yes of course," Mrs. Friar says. Her and Mr. Friar tell my parents goodbye, and when Lucas goes to my dad stops him.

"Would it be alright if Lucas stays?" My dad asks. "I think Topanga and I have questions that need answers for the both of them." The Friars are a bit hesitant at first, but reassurances by my mom that she wouldn't let anything happen to him and a reassurance from Lucas, they agree.

Mr. Friar gives me a hug goodbye, as does Mrs. Friar; her hug lingering a little longer. "Sweetie, if need anything, our home is open to you," she whispers near my ear only for me to hear. I pull away giving her a sweet smile and watch as they walk out of the apartment, leaving just the four of us.

"Let's all take a seat," my mom says as soon as the door closes.

I walk to the couch in the living room, and Lucas sits right next to me. My mom takes the chair off to the side, while my dad paces back and forth in front of us. I have no idea what he is thinking, and it's only making me feel sick to my stomach.

Minutes pass by, and none of us utters a word. I can feel my hands clam up again, the way they have been practically all day. I just want him to say anything.

"Dad," I finally speak up. He stops in his trek and snaps his head in my direction. "Please say something," I beg.

He slowly exhales and plops himself on the coffee table, sitting in front of Lucas and I. "How can you two be so irresponsible?!" he snarls. "My god. You two had bright futures ahead, and now what? A baby is only going to make everything harder than what it should be. I can't believe this." His eyes lock onto mine. "I expected so much more from you Riley." And with those words tears start to burn my eyes.

"Okay that's enough Cory," my mom stops him. She looks at me and Lucas, "Tell me your plan. What's the plan here?"

I open my mouth, but once again I know it's going to fail me. I know I'm not going to be able to say everything Lucas and I have been discussing for the last several weeks. I try again, but nothing. I see Lucas quickly glances at me and back to my parents. I watch as his lips part, but I stop him.

"Lucas is going to go to Cornell, and I'm going to take a gap year."

"Riley," I can feel Lucas' eyes on me, but I don't look away from my parents. "That wasn't the plan."

"No, it wasn't. The plan was for the both of us to take a gap year, but that doesn't make sense." I slowly take a deep breath and let it out. "He is going to Cornell, and I've already given my spot up at Yale."

"YOU WHAT?!" My mom yells as she stands up.

"I gave it up," my voice cracks. "I…I never wanted to go there. You wanted me to." I can see my mom's eyes boiling with anger. "When I go back to college, it will be a junior college and from there I'll transfer."

"And we do want to live together," Lucas says. "I have money saved up from working that is enough to get us on our feet." He coughs a few times, "My parents said they'd help as much as they can," his eyes move from my parents to me. "They said that we can live at my house until we got everything sorted out," his voice quivers a little.

"They did?" the words fly out, and Lucas nods.

"Well, it seems like you have everything all figured out," my mom says sarcastically. "You don't know the responsibilities that come with having a baby. The sacrifices you have to make."

"You're right I don't," I cry out. "But I'm going to learn, mom. Lucas and I are going to learn." Her eyes are still clouded with anger. I look to my dad, and that's when I see just how disappointed he is with me. "D-dad," my voice trembles. "I'm sorry." Tears stream down my cheeks.

His eyes meet mine, and for a second I think I see some clarity. "Riley, I love you," my mom says. She touches her hand to her face and slowly shakes her head. "But, right now, I think your father and I need a moment to process this all."

I nod, "I understand." I choke out. "I…I can stay somewhere else t-tonight," I suggest. I wait for them to argue for to stay, but they don't. They don't say anything.

I walk pass the both my parents to the front door, and when I turn around they are both looking down; not once looking in my direction. I take a sharp breath trying to holding in my sob. Lucas opens the door and as soon as I'm in the hallway, I let the tears fall.

Lucas wraps me in his arm pulling me close to his body. He runs his fingers through my hair the way he always does to comfort me. "It's going to be okay," he whispers. I want to believe, but right now it feels like the exact opposite.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note: So, that happened. I didn't see this coming. This is not what I had planned for this, it just sort of happened. It was just supposed to be a nice simple part two, but characters wanted to shout out me. LOL There is going to be another part, and hopeful the last part. I just don't know when. I'm sorry.**_


	3. Chapter 3

It's been weeks since my parents find out by pregnancy. They won't look at me for more than five seconds at a time, so I've been spending majority of my nights at Lucas' house, and I'm relieved by how supportive his parents are. Mrs. Friar has gone with us to some doctor's appointment making her happiness known, and Mr. Friar has been making plans about how his and Lucas are going to decorate for the baby. Both make me feel like I'm at home, but I'm not.

The night we told our parents, Lucas and I talked for hours about everything that happened. How I didn't know about his parents knowing, but he didn't want to pressure me into telling my parents before I was ready. He questioned me about changing the plans we had set for college. He was mad, but after explaining he understood. It really didn't make sense. We didn't both have to be behind. We made a promise that we wouldn't keep anything from each other, and every decision will be made together.

* * *

After my shift at Topanga's, I decide to go home. I knew my dad and Auggie would be home, but my mom wouldn't. When I get to the front, I contemplate whether I should go in or not. I get pulled out of my thoughts when I hear someone call out my name. I turn my head slightly and see Mrs. Benison standing there smiling at me. I watch her as her scan my body, and her smile slowly disappears.

My baby bump as become more visible being a little harder to hide, almost impossible depending on my clothes. She slowly makes her way to me, "Riley, are…are you pregnant?" she whispers, almost like it's a secret. Which I guess it kind of is, and I appreciate her discretion.

My eyes wander down to my stomach and back to her. "I am," I say in a matching whisper.

"Is that why you haven't been around?" she asks with care in her tone. "I don't mean to overstep my bounds at all. It's just I've called to see if you were available to babysit, and your parents said you've been busy working, and we haven't seen you around."

I clear my throat, "My parents aren't exactly pleased with me at the moment," my voice is quiet and broken.

She slowly exhales, "They're just shocked. They'll come around. I know they will." I nod. "I should get home. I have to start dinner before Henry and Caroline get home." I nod again. I watch Mrs. Benison turn on her heels, but turns to face me one last time. "You and Lucas are you going to be great parents. I've seen you two with Caroline, and the way she gushes over the two of you…you guys will be okay."

A small smile finds its way to my lips, "Thank you." Her words provide some comfort to me, and I can feel butterflies in my stomach. I turn my attention back to the front door and let out a long breath before making my way inside.

When I get inside, I don't see anyone, but I can hear talking coming from the bedrooms. I walk by my parents' room, and the door is closed but I can hear the TV on. I look down the hall to Auggie's room, and a feeling of guilt overcomes me. I've been an awful sister of late.

I slowly walk over to Auggie's room. He still had no idea what was going on. All he knew was that our parents and I weren't exactly getting alone at the moment, and that resulted in me not staying here. Once I'm in front of his bedroom door, I see that's it's slightly cracked. I knock softly before sticking my head in his room. He turns his attention to the door, and a smile instantly takes his lips as soon as he sees it's me.

"Riley, you're home!" he exclaims. I laugh as I push the door open letting myself in. I walk over to his bed, and he moves some pillows out of the way making room for me to sit. I see his eyes wander around like he's trying to think of what to say. Auggie sighs deeply and looks at me, "How come mom and dad are mad at you?"

I slowly exhale. I knew I was going to have to tell him eventually. I asked my parents to let me be the one to tell Auggie, and they agreed. "Well, they think I made a big mistake and are disappointed with me."

"Do you think what you did was a mistake?" he asks, and the question catches me a little off guard.

I let it play in my head for a second before parting my lips, "I…I, that's a complicated questions." I let out a deep breath and look down at my stomach. "I thought so for a little bit, but I don't think so anymore. I think it's something beautiful."

I watch a look of confusion wash across his face. "What did you do?"

I think for a second how exactly I'm going to explain what I did without telling him what I did. "Well, you know how Josh is our cool Uncle Josh?" Auggie nods. "Well, soon you are going to be cool Uncle Auggie…because I'm having a baby."

I see the tugging at the corners of his lips, and I let out a sigh of relief. "Cool Uncle Auggie…I like it," we both laugh. "So, all the fun things Uncle Josh takes me to do, I can take him, wait is the baby a boy."

I shrug, "Possibly. I find out at my next doctor appointment."

"Will you tell as soon as you find out? If the baby is a girl, I'll have tea parties with her if she wants them." I can't help the chuckle that escapes my lips as I ruffle his hair. "But, why are mom and dad mad? I thought babies make people happy."

"Mom and dad didn't want me to have a baby this soon, so it's a little messy. It'll be okay, though." I hear myself repeat the words Lucas has been telling me since I told him about my pregnancy.

It takes Auggie a minute or two to process everything, but one he does, I listen to him talk about everything he wants to do once he is an uncle. The excitement that he shows makes my heart feel warm and make the butterflies flutter in my stomach.

After a while of talking, I leave his room. I slowly close the door behind me, and I see my dad grinning softly at me, and I mimic it. Neither one of us says anything, and I'm a little scared to move. I wait a few seconds for him to say something, for me to find the courage to speak, but nothing. I take a step in the direction of my bedroom, hoping, praying, my dad calls out for me; but he doesn't.

Once I'm in my room, I saunter over to my bay window and plotting myself down. I stare out my window, watching people roam the streets below. I start to rub stomach, and for the first time I realize just how much I'm showing. My phone _dings,_ and I grab it to see a text from Lucas.

 ** _Lucas  
Are you staying here tonight? _**

I stare at it for a second not really sure what to reply. As much as I love sleeping under the same roof at Lucas, I miss my bed, I miss my parents. I start tapping at my screen, but stop when I hear someone knocking at my door.

"Come in," I call out. I watch the door knob turn, and my dad slowly emerges from behind the door. I give him a soft sad smile. He stands there for a second before walking over and taking a seat next to me at the bay window.

Silence falls between my dad and I. The tension is evident, and I'm waiting for him to say something, anything, because I know I can't. My mind can't form words right now. I look down at my stomach and start to rub small circles.

"You're really starting to show," he says in a hush tone.

"Yeah," I whisper, still not looking up.

He clears his throat, "Riley," I move my gaze from stomach to my dad, "I'm sorry." I part my lips, but he holds up his hand, "please let me finish," I nod. "I shouldn't have given you the cold shoulder for so long. Yes, I was disappointed, mad even, but you're my daughter and I shouldn't have shut you out. I did need a few days for it to settle in, for me to come to terms with it, but after that I should have come and spoken to you, not let this go on for so long." I can feel my eyes become glossed over, but I try to blink them back.

"You aren't my little girl anymore, and I think that's another reason I took the news so hard." He reaches over and grabs my hand. "Lucas is right about one thing. This baby is only going to make your future brighter. I know this because you and Auggie made my life brighter and happier." There go the butterflies again and more tears.

I watch him stare straight ahead. "I'm going to be a grandpa," he thinks out loud. A smirk spreads across his lips, and I instantly wrap my arms around him.

We stay in that moment until I we hear the front door being slam shut. "That's your mother." I swallow the lump in my throat. I didn't think I'd be facing her together. "Why don't you try talking to her? She's stubborn, and I'll wait right here."

"You aren't going to take no for an answer, are you?" He shakes his head, and I wipe my tear stain cheeks.

I slowly walk down the steps into the kitchen, and my mom's back is towards me. I wait anxiously for her to turn around. I can feel the nerves start to settle in the pit of my stomach. I clear my throat letting her know someone is behind her.

She slowly turns her head in my direction, and I can feel my heart quicken. "Riley, I didn't know you were here," her voice is stoic.

"Ye-yeah," I stammer. "I,I told Auggie about my pregnancy…He's excited to be cool Uncle Auggie," I say, hoping for a laugh, a smile, but I get nothing.

"Well, that's good," she moves around the kitchen pulling out pots and pans and placing them on the stove, and then tie an upon around herself I wait for her to say something else, but all I get is silence.

I walk over to the kitchen table and take my usual seat, that has been vacant for some time. I watch her take food out from the fridge and start chopping away. I'm patiently waiting for her to acknowledge the fact that I'm still here, but she doesn't and I feel my heart sink lower and lower.

The longer I was the longer I can feel my patients wear thin. I don't know what overcomes me, but before I know it I'm slamming my hands down on the table. I see that it startles my mom, and I know I have her attention know.

She slowly turns on her heels, and her eyes lock dead on mine. "You can't keep ignoring me, mom!" I shout. A chilling silence falls between us, and I squirm a little in my seat. "It's been four weeks, and you've barely spoken to me," I whisper loud enough for her to hear.

She takes a step towards the table, "This isn't easy for me." She shakes her head, "When I look at you, I see everything that you gave up."

"I gave up what you wanted me to do. I gave up the dream you had for me, but besides that I didn't give anything up. I can still do whatever is it I want to do," I argue.

My mom scoffs, "You still don't get it, Riley. You are having a baby, and everything is going harder. You can't live in Rileytown anymore. You are going to have a baby to worry about."

"I understand that! I never said it was going to be easy, but that doesn't mean it's impossible. I understand that you needed time, but I didn't think you were going to need this much time." Tears slowly start to fall, but I quickly wipe them away. "Mrs. Friar comes with Lucas and I to my doctor's appointment, and she smiles when I'm getting my ultrasound. But all I can think is how you aren't there. I just want my mom," I whisper. I see the color drain from my mom's face as soon as the words come out of my mouth. She parts her lips a few times, but I don't get a response.

Again, more silence. I'm sick and tired of the quiet. I feel my chest grow tight waiting her to respond. When I finally realize she isn't going to say anything, I slowly stand up. I stay put in my spot thinking if I gave her a second, she'll speak, but she doesn't.

I start to walk away and turn around one last time. I see my mom, slumped over the stove. Her shoulders are dropped, and I watch her bring her hand up and wipe her cheek. I think for a second about telling her I love her, but I decide not to.

When I get back to my room, my dad is still sitting in my bay window. His eyes meet my sad eyes, and his grin slowly fades. He doesn't say anything. I move around my room grabbing clothes and putting everything inside my bag.

"Staying the night at Lucas'?" my dad questions, and I can hear the defeat in his tone. I just nod my head not trusting my voice. "You should say bye to Auggie. He misses having you around."

"I, I will," I stutter. After I have everything packed. I place strap on my shoulder. I turn to look at my dad, and he pushes himself up. "I love you, dad," my voice is soft and sincere.

My dad takes me in his arms, and tears start to fall. I feel him place a kiss on top of my head. "I love you, too, Riley." He slightly pulls away, his eyes locked on mine, "Your mom will come around. It'll be okay." There are those words again, but I don't have the energy to argue.

I walk over to Auggie's room and tell him I'm going to be going back to Lucas', and I see the sadness take over his face. I apologize and tell him I'll see him soon and again promise to tell him the gender of the baby as soon as I find out, which he smiles at.

When I return to the kitchen, my mom's back is once again to me. My dad is sitting on the couch shifting his eyes between my mother and I, waiting to see if any words are exchange, but there aren't. I give my dad one last smile before making my way to the door. I pull the door open, but before walking out I look at my mom.

"I have an appointment next Wednesday at two. We get to find out what I'm having. I'd really like it if you came." My voice is filled with hope and sadness at the same time. She pulls her attention away from the stove for a second.

"I'll have to check my calendar," she says in the same stoic tone from earlier. I mumble an okay as I nod. I don't think I'll get anything else.

"Topanga," my dad says, "You-"

"No, it's okay," I interrupt him. "I-I'll see you guys soon," my voice breaks. I hurry out into the hallway, closing the door behind me.

When I get outside the building, I let out a deep breath, but with that came a sob. I dig through my bag looking for my phone to change my text to Lucas. I delete that text that I started to type earlier and start a different one.

 ** _Me  
Yeah things didn't go great over here. I'll be there soon. _**

Just as I hit send, I hear a _ding_ go off behind me. I turn around and see Lucas gazing at me. I quickly try to hide my face. "Wh-what are you doing here?" I ask as I brush at my cheeks.

"Your dad texted me. He said you needed me. What happened?" I hear the care in his voice, but right now I'm so blinded by hurt that it didn't matter. I don't say anything. I just shake my head, fearing if I spoke my voice will betray me, and I'll cry. "Here let me take that for you." He takes my bag from my shoulder and places it on his. "Riley, it's going to be okay."

I scoff. The words that once provided comfort have become an annoyance. "Does it look like it's going to be okay?" I grumble. "It's been a month, and my mom barely speaks to me. A month Lucas. This is not okay. Nothing is okay." And with the words came tears. "You don't know that it's going to be okay, so stop saying it!" I shout. I look around and see that we've, well I, have earned some looks from people that were walking the streets. I dry my tears and start to walk in the direction of Lucas' house. Him right behind me, but neither one of us saying a word.

* * *

Later that night, I had decided to go to bed early. The day had gotten the better of me, and I just wanted to sleep. Lucas and I tried to act as normal as possible in front of his parents, but I think they knew something was wrong.

I tossed and turned for what felt like forever, but that stops as soon as I hear the bedroom door creak open. I push myself up on my elbows, and with the light that shines through the window I can see a pair of green eyes staring at me causing my breath to hitch.

"So, I didn't mean to wake you," Lucas whispers.

"It's okay, I wasn't really sleeping. I couldn't sleep."

I watch him move to my side of the bed and taking a seat. I reach over to the bedside lamp, turning it on, and then sitting up completely. "Lucas, I'm so sorry about earlier. I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. I was just, I…I miss my mom. I love your mom, and I love that she comes to the appointments, and the fact that she hangs the pictures on the fridge. But-"

"You want your mom to do all of those things," he finishes for me, and I just nod. "It's okay. I get it. I knew your anger wasn't directed towards me, but Riley, she will come around. Your mom loves you. Just trust me okay?"

I slowly nod, "I trust you." He slowly leans in, and I close the gap between our lips. Butterflies start to flutter in my stomach. I break the kiss and our eyes lock, "I love you."

"And I love you." He pecks my lips.

* * *

A week has gone by, and my dad and I are talking more, but very little exchanges between my mom and I. Today is my appointment, and my mom has given me no indication that she is coming. I'm trying to remain hopeful, but I don't want to be disappointed.

Lucas and I are sitting in the waiting room waiting to be called back; Mrs. Friar couldn't make it today. I hear the bells that are attach to the door go off, and my head snaps in the direction. My shoulders instantly fall when I see it wasn't my mom. I feel Lucas grab my hand. My eyes lock with his, and I give him a sad smile.

A few more minutes go by, before someone opens the door that leads to the back, "Riley Matthews," she calls out. Lucas is the first one to stand, and he extends his hand to me to help me up. We make our way over to her, and she leads us through the door to a room.

I take the seat in the patient bed, and Lucas stands right next to me, holding my hand. "Are you excited? We get to find out what we are having." I hear the excitement in his voice, and I can't help the little giggle that escapes.

"A little Lucas would be nice." I smile. "But, a little Riley would be just as nice."

He bends over and kisses my forehead, "As long as he or she is healthy, that's all that counts." Butterflies that is all I feel in my stomach. They seem to be coming more and more often.

The door slowly opens, and I was expecting to see Dr. Collins, but instead, I see someone else. A smile quickly plays on my lips, and I feel Lucas give my hand a comforting squeeze.

"M-mom," I stumble over my words. "You made it." She smiles softly at me, but this smile is different than all the other ones she's given me these past few weeks. This one was real.

She walks over next to Lucas and gives him a hug. "Good to see you Mrs. Matthews," Lucas says.

"You too." She looks at me, and Lucas steps away giving us space.

"I'm really happy you're here," my voice cracks, but this time I know it's because I'm happy.

"Me too." She smiles. "We still need to talk, but later." I nod just as the door opens again, and I see Dr. Collins walk in.

She's tall with dark silk straight hair that flows down her back and light brown eyes. She gives Lucas and I her friendly smiles, "It's nice to see you two." She extends her arm out to my mom. "I'm Dr. Collins." My mom takes Dr. Collins hand, "I'm Topanga. Riley's mother."

"Ah, yes it's nice to finally meet you. Riley, here has spoken highly of you." My mom shifts her gazes over to me, and her eyes are glossed over.

Dr. Collins moves to the ultrasound machine on the other side of me. She makes small talk the way we always do while she clicks away on her computer. "So, today we find out if you're having a boy or a girl," she says not looking away from the screen. She reaches to the counter and grabs a tube gel, and before she puts it on my stomach she warns me, like always, that it might be cold.

Dr. Collins moves the wand around my stomach, and instead of looking at the screen, I'm looking at my mom's face. I see a smile spread across her lips, and I can't help the same one the eludes from my lips. This is what I've been wanting. Lucas takes his place next to me, wanting to get a better look.

"You have a very active baby here. Do you feel a lot of kicking?" Dr. Collins asks. "Some mothers describe it as butterflies."

I smile, "I think I do. I just didn't know it was the baby kicking." Lucas grins at me as he interlocks our fingers.

Dr. Collins continues to move the wand around. She does this for a few minutes, stopping ever few seconds to click on the mouse to capture a picture. She keeps the wand in one area longer, and the corners of her lips slowly lift. "So, would you two like to know what you are having?"

"Yes," Lucas and I say eagerly, causing laughter to come from all of us.

"Well," she pauses for theatrics, "you two are having a baby boy."

Lucas and I exchange a look, and I see his eyes twinkle with happiness and my heart quickens. I'm having a boy! I can already picture a little Lucas running around, and to think there are going to be another one of him on this earth makes the butterflies come alive.

"I'm going to have a grandson," I hear my mom whispers. She shakes herself out of her daze and looks at me, smiling. "You're father and Auggie are going to be happy. They didn't want me to tell you, but they were hoping for a boy."

Dr. Collins asks how many copies she should print out of the sonogram, and my mom immediately says she wants one; and just like that the weight that I've felt in my heart for a while, I feel melt away.


	4. Chapter 4

The end of August is when Lucas and I made the move, so he could be closer to campus. It's a small one bedroom apartment, and it's perfect for Lucas and I—and soon our son.

The day I moved out was also the day my mom and I finally had the talk her and I still needed.

* * *

 _I had just finished packing the last of my things when I hear my bedroom door creak. I look up from the box in front of me, and I see my mom standing in the doorway looking at me—almost watching my every move. "So, today's the big day. Excited?"_

 _I nod. "I am, but I'm really scared." My mom takes a few steps to where I'm sitting on the floor, and she slowly lowers herself down._

 _"Why are you scared?"_

 _I shrug my shoulders as I fold the bit of my clothes that I have left and place them in the box. "I don't know," I say not once looking up, but I feel my mom's fingers underneath my chin so I'm looking at her._

 _My eyes meet hers. "Riley, why are you scared?"_

 _I sigh deeply. "What if you were right? What if I am living in Rileytown, and I have this picture in my head that everything is going to be perfect. I don't think I'm beginning realistic. I'm too young for this."_

 _"Well, I will agree that you are too young for this." I hold my breath at her words. Even though her and I moved passed it, I always fear that the mere mention of it will start an argument. "But, you aren't too young to give this baby all of your love, which I know both you and Lucas will." She slowly sighs. "Everything else though, I wasn't right. Sometimes being in Rileytown can be a good thing." My mom laughs a little. "Your dad was in his own little world too when I was pregnant with you."_

 _"He wasn't being practical, and maybe I was being a little too practical if that makes any sense. I was still in law school, and I remember how difficult it was for me and your father. But, we made it through it, and I know you and Lucas can too." She grabs a sweater and starts to fold it. "It might have been one of the reasons I was so hard on you two. You were thinking like your father, and I guess I believed you weren't thinking straight. You had all these answers, you just told me you gave up your spot at Yale, and I might have been hurt that Lucas' parents knew before I did."_

 _She places the sweater in the box, and then takes my hands in hers, and our eyes slowly meet. "I want you to know that I love you, and I'm excited to my grandson that I already love so much. I'm sorry it took me so long to come around and for not being there for you from the beginning. And, if you two need anything, don't hesitate to ask me your dad."_

 _I feel tears start to form in my eyes, but they are the opposite of the painful tears I once cried after conversations with my mom. These tears are from happiness. "I love you, mom."_

 _"I love you, too." She stands up and bends over to help me up pulling me into a hug. The moment with my mom is short lived when there is a soft knock on the door. We pull apart to see Lucas and my dad standing there staring at my mom and I with smiles on their lips._

 _Lucas clears his throat. "Should we start taking all of this down to the truck too?" He gestures to the things in the corner—it was all the gifts I had received from the baby shower Maya put together for me—and I nod._

 _My dad steps around Lucas, and he grabs a box, and my mom does the same. Lucas waits for them to both leave the room before taking a step towards me. "Everything okay?"_

 _I look at the door and back to Lucas. "It is." And for the first time in a while I truly felt like everything was finally going to be okay._

* * *

It's been almost three months since we've moved, and mine and my mom's relationship has never been better. She has answered all and any questions I have had about my pregnancy or about any concerns I have when the baby arrives. We continue to talk every day.

Lucas and I have settled into our apartment. With my due date only a week away, Lucas and I made sure to baby proof everything, and to build the crib.

But, the closer the big day gets the more nervous I become for so many reasons, all reasons being caused by fear. Fear of giving birth, fear of being a bad mom, fear of being alone when my water breaks.

Besides Lucas, the only people that I know here are our neighbors, and they didn't seem like the nicest people. When Lucas isn't at school or home, he's at work so sometimes it can be lonely. But, he is always there for me. He makes any fear disappear.

It's Monday evening, and Lucas has just gotten off work. When he walks inside our apartment, I'm sitting on the couch with my feet resting on top of the coffee table calling out different names resting my hands on my stomach. I hadn't realized Lucas had walked in until I hear a muffled chuckle.

My head snaps in the direction of the sound, and when I do Lucas smiles warmly at me. "Hi."

"Hey." He shuffles towards me and bends over quickly pecking my lips before taking the open space next to me. He leans in close and I can feel his breath on my neck. "What are you doing?" he whispers, and it makes my heart quicken.

I laugh a littler nervously. "Okay, don't make fun of me. But, I wanted to see if he would respond to any of the names we thought of, like if he would kick. We can't put off his name any longer, so so far nothing for Oliver, Noah, Mason, William, or Isaiah, so tell Zay sorry." Lucas and I both chuckle. "There are still a few more to try. Why don't you try them?" I hand Lucas the small notebook, and he takes it from my hands.

"Okay, little guy," Lucas says, and I instantly feel our son start kicking rapidly, and Lucas notices. He doesn't pause to think about moving his hands to my stomach, he automatically does it.

"Every time he hears your voice, he can't stay still."

"That's why it won't work if I say the names, he'll kick regardless."

I roll my eyes with a smile playing on my lips. "I know." Lucas' eyes study my bare stomach, and his hands roam all around. "Well, what about you? Do you have a name you like more than the rest?"

He smiles. "Maybe, but I don't want to influence your choice. Do you have a name your like?"

"There is one that has grown on me." I smirk, and his eyes meet mine. "How about on the count of three we both say the name we like? Deal?" Lucas nods. "Okay, on three. One…two…three."

"Thomas," we both say in unison, smiling at one another.

"Did we just name our son?" Lucas asks through his cheeky smile.

"I think we did."

Lucas drops down in front of me, and I feel his lips on my stomach. I can feel butterflies along with our son's kicking going crazy. "We can't wait to meet you, Thomas." He kisses my stomach again, and Thomas responds by moving around more.

* * *

A couple days pass, and I'm in the same spot folding laundry waiting for Lucas to come home from his classes. He was a little hesitant at first. The closer I get to my due date, the more worry he becomes—worried that I'm going to be alone when my water breaks.

There's a soft knock at the door, and I slowly push myself up and waddle to the front door. I peck through the keyhole, and I can't control the smile that captures my lips. I open the door and take a step back letting them walk inside.

"Mom, what are you doing here?" I say through my smile, and her eyes widen as soon as she sees my stomach.

"How is it possible that you continue to be bigger and bigger?" She laughs and closes the door behind her. I notice she has a small duffle bag with her, and she notices my eyes wander. "Come on lets go sit down, and I'll explain."

My mom drops her bag by the door, and she helps me back the couch. "I called Lucas earlier today after you and I got off the phone, and I was worried. I heard the uneasiness in your voice, so I called him and asked if it would help if you had someone around. Lucas seems to be busy with school, and with your due date only two days away, I didn't want your water to break while you were alone, and you'd panic. I just didn't want you to be alone."

Tears start to overflow from my eyes, and my mom scoots closer and takes me in her arms, and she rubs small circles on my back. "Riley, what's wrong?"

I slowly exhale. "I'm scared. The closer the day gets, the more anxious I get. What…what if I'm not a good mom?"

My mom stops rubbing circles on my back and gives my shoulder a comforting squeeze. "I know for a fact that you are going to be a great mom. There are going to be days where you might feel like you have no idea what you are doing. I had plenty of those when I first had you, and even when I had Auggie. But, Riley you are going to be a wonderful mother."

I lean against my mom and sniffle. "I'm happy you're here."

* * *

It's almost one in the morning, and I've been laying in bed staring at the ceiling trying to fall asleep, but I can't. I started having what I think are contractions around nine. I didn't say anything because they weren't bad. They felt like cramps. However, they are slowly starting to become stronger and getting a little harder to bear with.

Another twenty minutes pass, and that's when I realize that sleep doesn't seem like it's going to happen tonight especially with the baby's constant kicking.

I carefully get up from bed making sure not to wake Lucas. I slowly open the bedroom door and take each step as quietly as I can, but after my fourth step I see my mom start to stir around on the couch. I try to walk slower, but that only seems to make her move around more and she's up before I even make it to the kitchen—and it's a short walk.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. I just wanted something to drink," I whisper, and my mom smiles tiredly.

"It's okay." Her voice is a little husky, and she slowly sits up. "Do you want a cup a tea? Whenever you had trouble getting to sleep, a cup of peppermint tea usually helped." I slowly nod and finish taking the few steps to the kitchen, and my mom is right behind me. She pulls out a chair and gestures for me to sit. "I'll boil the water you just relax."

After a few minutes, my mom places a mug in front of me before taking the seat right across from me. "Feeling any better from our talk earlier?"

I shrug. "A little bit, but I still have my doubts."

My mom nods. "That is to be expected, but you have tons of support. You have Lucas, your father, myself, the Friars. Don't hesitate to ask for help."

"I-" I stop once I feel the cramping in my lower stomach again. Usually, I've been able to ignore them, but this one is more intense.

"You okay?" She waits for me to say something, but when I don't say anything after a couple of seconds she places a hand on my arm.

I exhale. "Yeah. I think I've been having contractions. It's been coming and going most of the night. They've been bearable until about an hour ago."

She grins. "You're going to have him sooner rather than later. I think it's a good thing I came. Have you and Lucas picked a name yet?" she asks as she stands up and walks to the cupboards to grab the sugar.

"We have. Just yesterday actually." She turns and looks at me with her eyes wide.

"And I'm barely hearing about it now!" she whisper yells. "How can you not tell me what you and Lucas are naming my grandson?" She shakes her head as she searches the cupboards. "I forgive, but only if you tell me."

I laugh as I watch her struggle to find the sugar, so I stand up to help her. But, almost instantly I fluid run down my leg and onto the floor. "M-mom," my voice consumed with fear.

"Oh my god! It's time. It's really time. Do you and Lucas have a bag all packed? We need to wake Lucas." She starts to take steps in the direction of the bedroom, but I call out for her.

I pull myself out of my trace and place a hand on my stomach. "I can do it. Plus, I want to change."

"You want to change, right now?" she asks a puzzled, and I smile sheepishly, and she steps to the side allowing me room to walk by as fast as I can at the moment.

I push open the bedroom door and blindly reach for the light switch. I look to Lucas who is sound asleep, and I take a deep breath before walking over to his side of the bed.

I gently shake him awake, and at first, he mumbles but he doesn't budge. I shake him again, but this time a little rougher. His green eyes slowly start to open, and it takes a second for his to meet mine. "Riley," his voice is faint, "is everything okay?" He yawns and stretches his arms.

"My mom and I were talking and drinking tea and then my water…it broke." His eyes fully open, and he immediately jumps out of bed.

"Now? It broke now?" I nod, and he frantically starts to move around the room, grabbing any clothes he sees throwing it on. I can hear him mumbling as he stuggles to pull on his socks.

I step in front of him, and I take his face in my hands and my eyes begin to search his. "Lucas, take a deep breath." He inhales deeply and holds it for a second before releasing.

"How are you so calm?"

I chuckle slightly. "Believe me I'm not. I'm terrified right now."

Lucas places his hands on my waist. "Me too, but as long as we have each other everything will be okay." He slowly stands up and softly presses his lips against mine. When he pulls away, he slides his hands from my waist to my stomach. I can feel our son move, and by the smile on Lucas' face so can he. "I'm ready to meet Thomas."

"So am I."

Just as the words leave my mouth, my mom knocks softly before walking in. "I love this moment, but we need to get to the hospital. Are you feeling okay? No more contractions?"

Again, I part my lips, but I stop once I start to feel what I think are cramps in my lower stomach, but way more intense. I feel Lucas rubbing small circles on my back, and my mom has moved closer to me. "I think it's time to go to the hospital. What do you say?" Lucas says, and I nod.

* * *

It's been hours; hour of contractions, hours of the pain increasing. I am physically and mentally exhausted. Each contraction the pain becomes more agonizing. I thought I had prepared myself for this, but nothing was able to prepare me for this.

When the doctor finally comes in to check how far along I'm dilated, fear overwhelms me when she tells me it's time to push. With every push, a yell escape my lips and so does energy.

I have no idea how long I've been pushing, but I don't think I can do this any longer.

Lucas has not left my side once. I hear him talk to me trying to distract me every single time a contraction comes, but his voice fades when I'm told to push. But, knowing he is in the room with me helps me greatly.

"Okay, I can see the baby's head." Dr. Collins looks up at me. "Riley, I'm going to need you to push," she says, but that's the last thing I want to do.

The pain that I'm feeling right now is excruciating. I can feel fresh tears start welling in my eyes, and I start shaking my head. "Riley, you need to push," my mom pleas, but I continue to shake my head.

I look at my mom, and my glossy eyes meet hers. "I can't…I can't do this," I cry out, and tears are flowing down my cheeks. "I can't," I repeat. "It hurts!"

"I know it does, honey, but I promise everything you are feeling right now will all be worth it." My mom runs her hand over my head. I shift my attention to Lucas, and he tightens his grip around my hand.

"Riley, we really need you to push." The urgency in the doctor's voice clearly evident.

My mom's words run through my head, and it's what I need in this moment to start pushing again. I hear someone in the room counting, and I let out a scream of pain.

I'm pushing and pushing, giving it my all, and at the same time wanting to quit. My body is drained.

Dr. Collins tells me to give one final push, and I do letting out another scream. But, my scream is cloak by the sound of a crying baby—my crying baby—and I feel Lucas press his lips to my forehead as I let out an exhausted laugh.

After Thomas is cleaned and swaddled in a blanket, he is handed to me. I feel an overflooding amount of joy. Tears race down my cheeks, and Lucas is right next to me wiping them away and planting kissing on my head and admiring our son.

"He's here. You did it," Lucas whispers.

"He's so handsome," I say through my tears. I turn my head slightly to look at my mom, and when I do, I see a smile spread across her lips and her wiping away her tears.

She takes a step closer, eyes glued on the baby. "What's his name?" she sniffles.

I look at Lucas, and we share a tired smile. "Thomas," Lucas says.

"Thomas," she smiles. "He looks so much like you, Riley, when you were born. Except those eyes. I wonder where he got those bright green eyes from." She laughs as she looks at Lucas. "You two are going to be great parents."

* * *

The first week after we left the hospital, my mom had stayed with us a few days, but as soon as she left Mrs. Friar came and stayed with us for another few days before leaving. It was something both Lucas and I appreciated.

Although during both their stays, neither Lucas or I did much when it came to Thomas. The only time I was needed was when I either breastfeed or needed to pump. But, they both changed Thomas' diapers, woke up late at night when he would cry, and Lucas and myself seem to stand by and oversee everything.

So, now that it's finally just Lucas and I with Thomas we are both a little nervous.

"He's so tiny," Lucas says looking down at Thomas. "He's perfect." Butterflies awake in my stomach as I watch Lucas with our son, and for a second it feels weird feeling butterflies without Thomas' kicking.

I return to the living room with a change of clothes for Thomas and hand it them to Lucas, but instead of taking the clothes, Lucas stares at them. "You want me to change him?"

I laugh. "Why wouldn't?"

"I, uh, I don't think I can do that. What if I hurt him?"

I shake my head trying my best to stifle my laughter. "Lucas, you aren't going to hurt him. Our moms aren't around to help us anymore. We have to do it on our own."

He slowly exhales before taking the clothes from my hand. Lucas gives me one last look hoping I'll give in and do it for him. But, when I shake my head, indicating that I'm not going to do it, Lucas sighs in defeat.

Lucas slowly starts to take off the onesie that is already on Thomas, and I see him stiffen a little when Thomas starts to cry. "You didn't hurt him. It's around the time he's usually hungry. I'll get his bottle ready."

When I come back with the diaper, I see now fully dressed in a long sleeve onesie, pants and socks. "Now was that so hard?" I tease him a little.

Lucas shakes his head as he takes Thomas' in his arms. "It wasn't," Lucas says looking at Thomas as he settles onto the couch. "You know your mom was right, he does look like you." Lucas moves his free hand to Thomas', and Thomas wraps his hand around one of Lucas' fingers.

"Except those eyes." I sit next to Lucas. "They seem to get greener and greener by the day." I give Lucas the bottle, and he gently places the nipple of the bottle in Thomas mouth.

Neither one of us says a word as we both stare in awe at Thomas. The only sound that is heard in the suckling from Thomas.

I rest my head on Lucas' shoulder. "Tomorrow you go back to school."

Lucas' boss had given him some time off work, and I couldn't have been more relieved. Along with not working, Lucas had missed two weeks of school. He had talked to his professor, and they understood his situation. However, they didn't recommend missing more than two weeks of class.

He moans quietly. "I know. I'm trying not to think about all the work I'm going to have to make up for. I just don't know how I'm going to be able to handle not seeing you or him all day." He places a kiss on Thomas' forehead, and then turns his attention to me.

My heart starts to race, and I feel myself growing nervous. "Are you blushing?" Lucas asks with grin across his lips.

"Maybe a little, but watching you with our son is making me fall in love with you all over again." Lucas doesn't hesitate to carefully lean towards me, and I meet him half way closing the gap between our lips.

* * *

It's been a few days since Lucas returned to school, and I knew he was going to need to focus and catch up in all his classes. My first day alone with Thomas I was nervous to say the least, but the more time I spent alone with him the easier it became.

Lucas has been consumed with homework, and although he wants nothing more to drop everything and send time with Thomas and I, Lucas and I both know that he can't. I didn't mind though. Thomas is a good baby. However, that changes.

A week has gone by, and Thomas has not stopped crying. It isn't his cry that tells me that he is hungry, or that he needs his diaper changed, or that he wants to be held. I have no idea what this cry means, and it seems no matter what I do nothing helps.

Lucas tries to help, but he also has so much to do with school and not much time to complete it. So, I try my best to deal with it myself. I call both our parents, and the both say the same thing—colic. They tell me it'll pass, but there are things that I can to help. And, I try everything but nothing helps.

More days pass, and his crying continues. I haven't had a good nights rest in over a week, and I can feel exhaustion start to overcome me.

I open the door from the bedroom and stride into the kitchen where Lucas is at doing homework. "I understand that you have homework you need to do, but can you take him for five minutes? He hasn't stopped crying, and I'm exhausted." I continue to rock Thomas in my arms trying my best to sooth him.

Lucas doesn't think twice about getting up from the table and walking over to me. He takes Thomas from my arms and starts to rock him softly. "Go lay down. I got him."

I sigh in relief. "Thank you." I turn on my heels and saunter to our bedroom.

As soon as I enter the bedroom, I close the door behind shutting out Thomas' cries and I instantly feel guilty. But, I don't know how much longer I can continue like this. I inch closer to the bed, and the closer I get the more mixed feelings I feel.

But, as soon as I lay down and pull the blanket over myself, I feel the heaviness start to settle in my eyes—a heaviness I can no longer fight, and just like that I drift into a deep sleep.

It feels like I've only been asleep for a few minutes before I feel someone shake me awake. My eyes flutter open, but I'm struggling to keep them open. "Riley, I really need you to take him. I have to finish this paper before my morning class." I don't say anything. I just lay there with my eyes still close, but they shoot open when I hear a familiar cry.

I groan and rub my eyes. "What time is it?" I ask as I sit up, my voice a bit raspy.

"It's almost midnight, and I still have an essay to do, but I can't do it because Thomas won't stop crying."

I sigh slightly. I had only been sleeping for an hour, the most. I stand up and extend my arms taking Thomas from Lucas, and neither one of us says anything to each other.

As of lately, there has been tension between Lucas and I. He's been stressed with his classes, and I've been feeling overwhelmed. So, to add a baby that won't stop crying to the mix can only make everything ever more difficult.

For an hour or two, I think Thomas has finally stopped and fallen asleep. But, just as I'm about to doze off to sleep, I hear him start to become fussing, and no matter what I do nothing is working. It's been hours he has woken up, and his cries ring through the bedroom.

I pace around trying my best to hold it together, to not break down even though that's exactly what I want to do at this moment. I look down at my son, who I have cradled in my arms, and I can't understand what I'm doing wrong. Why he won't stop crying. I just really need him to stop crying.

I want to do this myself. I don't want to disrupt Lucas because I know he has his school to worry about right now. He's been playing catch up since he has been missing a few classes, but the longer I hear Thomas continuously cry the more I can feel my patience start to dwindle.

So, I take a deep breath, and open the bedroom door. I reluctantly take steps in the direction of the kitchen. I didn't want to bother Lucas, but I can't do this alone.

"Lucas, I need help. I don't know why he won't stop crying, and…and I don't know what to do." I hear the crack in my voice, and I don't know how much longer I can keep my tears from sliding down my cheeks.

He lets out a groan in frustration, and turns around. "I really need to get this done. Just give me another hour or two and I can take him."

I blink a few times to push the tears back. "Just five minutes…five minutes that is all I'm asking."

"I don't have five minutes. I promise I'll take him once I'm done."

I scoff. "No, you won't. You are going to need to get a couple of hours of sleep before your class. I just need a few minutes to compose myself." I look down at Thomas wishing he would stop crying.

I see Lucas eyes move between Thomas and I, and I have no idea what he is thinking. Maybe we were foolish in thinking everything was going to work it's self out, and that everything was going to be okay because in this moment everything is most definitely not okay.

"Riley, just an hour. I'll be done in an hour, and I'll take him."

I know the second my lips part I'm going to cry, and I don't know if I can trust myself in speaking right now. Possibly saying something when I'm not thinking rational because I haven't been able to rest, or the fact that I feel like a terrible mom because I can't figure out why my baby won't stop crying.

My eyes stay locked onto Thomas' face, and all I see in agonizing pain. My eyes slowly shift up to Lucas' green eyes that were once filled with warmth and life, but now I see them dull and exhausted. But, my mind isn't processing that right now, my mind is solely focused on the fact that I'm exhausted. That Thomas won't stop crying, and that I need help.

"I can't wait an hour. I need your help now, Lucas. He is our son. I understand that you have school and-"

"But you don't!" Lucas cuts me off, and I hear the rise in his voice. "You don't sit through hours of lectures, and then come home to not only have hours of homework, but also a baby that hasn't stopped crying in almost a week. I'm stressed here. I didn't get to take a year off school the way you chose to do."

By the time he finishes speaking, I can feel myself boiling with anger. I can feel the tears slowly trickle down my cheeks, and I quickly wipe them away.

"I chose to take the year off school?" I snicker through my tears. "Are you serious right now? You don't think I'd rather be in school instead of handling a baby! But, how would that work with both of us in school trying to raise our son? Huh…tell me Lucas." The venom in my voice is powerful, and I look down at Thomas—who has not stopped crying once—and I know I should stop, but I don't.

"You were the one who told me that everything was going to be okay, or do you not remember that. You promised me everything was going to be okay, but everything is the opposite of okay." Again, I look at Thomas, and I know I shouldn't be yelling at Lucas while I have him in my arms. I can feel Thomas start to squirm around, and he starts to scream cry, and seeing my son like that only makes me feel worse and tears start racing down my cheeks.

I look at Lucas, and I don't know how we got here. This isn't where we were supposed to be. We were supposed to be enjoying time with our infant son, but instead we are both fuming with frustration.

I take a deep shaky breath. "Maybe we need some time apart. You need quiet, and I need help. I'm going to go stay with my parents for a bit, and I'm taking Thomas with me." I watch his lips part, but quickly close. I wait for him to say something, but he doesn't. I wait for him to take a step towards, but he doesn't. He doesn't do anything besides sit there and stare at me.

I bit my bottom lip trying to hold back my sob, and I turn in the direction of our bedroom, and with each step I take I can feel the heaviness in my heart grown thicker and thicker. I wait for him to call out for me, but he doesn't—maybe he did, but Thomas' crying masked it.

When I get to the room, I close the door behind me. I move to the dresser by the bed and grab my phone. I know it's almost four in the morning, but I need my mom.

The phone rings a few times before my mom's voice comes through. I don't tell her everything, but I don't think I need to. Thomas' crying along with mine spoke enough truth.

 ** _I know it's late, and I know I'm hours away, but can you come get me, mom, and take me and Thomas back with you?_ ** My voice breaks with each word, and my sobs become heavy.

 _I'm on my way, Riley._

I hang up the phone and toss it on the bed before I slowly sit on the edge of the bed. Thomas' cry seems to have subsided a bit, but not completely stop. "It's going to be okay. Everything is going to be okay my sweet sweet boy." I lean forward pressing my lips to his forehead softly.


	5. Chapter 5

_Okay, so this is the final part for Baby too Soon. I really hope you all enjoyed this short multi-chapter fic. Thank you to everyone who read and the feedback. :) 3_

* * *

It's been days since I left. Lucas has called every day, and I send pictures of Thomas to him. Our calls last no more than ten minutes and consist of mostly silence between us. The silence between Lucas and I never bothered me before. It was something that I always found comfort in, but now it's different.

The silence that lingers between him and I now have been scary. It's almost like the ability to talk to one another disappeared, and neither one of us knows what to say. Actually, it's almost like we aren't comfortable speaking to each other, and it hurts because speaking to Lucas is one of my favorite things in the world and I just want to get back to where we were. But, I'm worried that maybe we can't.

Silence has become an enemy to me, and right now that is all that surrounds me. Auggie is at school, my parents are at work, Thomas is sleeping, and my mind was running wild until a knock at the door breaks the silence.

I couldn't be more relieved. I saunter over to the door, and I know who I'm hoping to see on the other side of the door, but I know it isn't going to be him.

I pull the door open, and I'm met with a pair of blue eyes staring at me. I'm almost scared to speak in fear that I'm going to cry. I didn't tell anyone I was home. I wanted to be alone. I have my son and myself to worry about.

I don't say anything I just push the door open wider and turn on my heels and return to the couch tucking my legs underneath me. My stare locks onto the coffee table, but I can hear the front door close and feet shuffling across the floor, and soon I feel the movement of someone sitting next to me.

"You know I drove all the way to Ithaca only to find out that you weren't there. That you and Thomas have been here for four days now, yet I had no clue."

I can't help but roll my eyes. "Well, I just needed some time alone." I didn't mean for my voice to be harsh, but it was.

"Riles, what happened? Why are you here?"

"It's nothing Maya."

I can feel her shift and her eyes glued to me. I don't want to meet them because I know if I see her looking at me with any hint of sadness I'm going to break, and I don't want to break. I don't want to cry. Today, I haven't cried, and I want to keep it that way.

I don't say anything. I simply shake my head, but I should have known that wasn't going to stop her from pushing. Nothing ever did in the past.

"Please, talk to me. Lucas didn't say much. He just said that you decided to go home for a few days." I nod my head, but I wasn't ready to talk about it.

To be honest, it wasn't anybody's business. I talked to my mom about it, but it was only because she came to get me in the middle and the night. I held her hand the entire way back while I cried, and when we got back to the apartment, I was as vague as possible with my dad about what happened—but I'm pretty sure my mom filled him in.

"Honey, will you tell me what's wrong?" I shake my head. "Why not? I thought we can tell each other everything."

I reluctantly look away from the table and my eyes lock onto her blue eyes. I can see them pleading with me to talk, and for a second, I do think about telling her everything. However, I take a deep breath and shake my head again.

Her eyes scan my eyes then rake over my body. I'm sure she's taking in my appearance. My messy bun that goes beyond the fashionable messy bun. My mismatch clothes with a bit of dried spit up on my shoulder, and the dark bags under my eyes.

I let out a snarky laugh. "If you're having sex, I hope you're being safe." It's the only thing I can think to say. It's how I feel. I love Thomas with every inch me, but as of late, I find myself wondering what if.

Maya hesitantly scoots closer to me, and she drops her hand onto my arm and with that single touch, I lose it. My head drops to her shoulder, and I feel her wrap her arms around me, and it only makes me start to sob.

She rubs small circles on my back, and I can feel my body trembling. She doesn't say anything. She lets me cry, and I'm waiting for her to say that everything is going to be okay, but she doesn't—and the fact that she doesn't, terrifies me. She can't say everything is going to be okay because it might not be.

After a few minutes, I pull away and do my best to dry my tears. "Will you please tell me what happened? I want to help you, but I can't do that if you won't talk to me."

"There isn't anything you can do," I whisper. There is a slight pause before my eyes meet hers again. "Do you think me and Lucas were naïve to think everything was going to be okay?"

She lets out a heavy sigh, and I'm not sure I'm going to like the answer, but maybe it's something I need to hear. "I think you and Lucas were hopeful, and that isn't bad. But I also think that the two of you were high off of the happiness that the both of you felt, and once everything started to get difficult it became a dose of reality too quick."

"So, I wasn't prepared for this, is what you're saying?" I say a little too defensively.

"No," Maya replies quickly. "I just," she shakes her head. "Actually, it doesn't matter what I think. What matters is what do you think?"

I let the question run around in my head before letting out a heavy sigh. "I think I didn't want to think about the fact that I put my life on hold to have a baby. I needed to make myself believe that being pregnant, this young, was a going to be a good thing, so I focused on the good to try to drown out the bad." By the time I finish, I can feel tears filling my eyes to the brim.

"There is bad that I didn't want to see," I whisper hoping she won't hear. She doesn't need to know about the sleepless night and my fears that I'm not a good mom. She doesn't need to know exactly what happened or what was said between Lucas and me that made me leave and come here. She doesn't need to know that I'm having doubts about mine and Lucas' future together. She isn't the person I want to confide in anymore because even though I know she'll care, we have different ideas of what our main priorities should be.

Just as she is about to say something Thomas' cry is heard over the baby monitor. "I'll be right back." Maya nods, and I stand up and head towards my old bedroom.

Once I'm in my room, I can clearly hear Thomas' cry but it isn't a piercing cry like it was nights ago. It isn't his cry that lets me know he's hungry or that he needs to be changed. It's just his cry to let know that he is awake and wants to be held.

I walk over to his basinet, and I smile at him before scooping him into my arms. I use the hand of my arm that isn't supporting his head to run over his soft fine hair. "Did someone sleep okay?" I say though my smile.

Thomas looks up at me, and I get lost in his green eyes. I never thought a pair of eyes (other than Lucas') can make me fall in love, but I was wrong. I didn't know it was possible to love to this magnitude. I love Lucas, but the love I feel for Thomas is something completely different.

It's a love I know without a single doubt in my mind will never fade. It's an inseparable love.

I stay in my old bedroom rocking Thomas in my arms. His crying has stopped, and I'm taking in his existence. How could I have possibly thought that this isn't what I wanted? Of course, the timing wasn't ideal, but the thought of not having him now that he isn't here is heart wrenching. He's a part of me, he's a part of Lucas. Thomas is us in one.

"Can I hold him?" I hear a soft voice, and I see Maya standing in the doorway staring at me and Thomas.

I look down at Thomas and back to Maya and give her kind smile. "Of course, you can." She carefully takes a step forward. She looks almost too scared to move.

When she is standing in front of me, she holds out her arms and the quickly pulls them back. "What if I hurt him?"

I laugh. "You won't I promise." She inches her arms out but drops them to her side. "Would it be better if you were sitting down, and I hand him to you?"

Now, it was her turn to laugh. "Yeah. I actually think I like that idea way better." She takes a seat on the foot of my bed, and I move to stand in front of her with Thomas in my arms. "Okay, I'm ready." She holds out her arms, and I gently pass Thomas to her.

I watch a smile spread across her lips as she looks down at Thomas, and it makes me feel warm inside. I slowly lower myself next to Maya just as she takes her free hand and grabs Thomas' small one.

"I don't know if you heard when I said there was bad."

"I did," Maya says but doesn't look away from Thomas.

"Well, it doesn't seem so bad when I think about Thomas. He makes everything worthwhile. I'll admit I was terrified, and I might have thought my life was over when I found out I was pregnant. But, looking at him, I know what my dad meant when he said his life was just beginning when Auggie and I were born." I smile at Thomas.

"You and huckleberry will be okay, you know, that right?"

I don't look away from Thomas, and I don't let my smile deter either. I want to believe what she said is true, but since I've left, things between Lucas and I have been tensed. So, I don't say anything. I just nod my head in hopes that she won't push.

* * *

Maya stays over for hours leaving before anyone else got back to the apartment, and the majority of the time she spends holding Thomas—she did hand him over however when it was time to change his diaper.

She made me get dressed and put on a little makeup. She said just because I am a new mom doesn't mean I should look like a new mom who hasn't slept in days. I'll admit being slightly dressed up with my hair brushed out with a little of mascara helped made me feel a little better.

When my mom gets home from work, I make sure to have Thomas and myself ready. I don't let her take more than three steps inside before I'm asking for a ride somewhere I should have gone days ago.

After a fifteen minute drive, I find myself standing in front of a very familiar house. I knock on the door, and a little bit of me is hoping that no one answers. I don't know if Lucas told his parents that I've been in the city for days, but I'm sure Mr. and Mrs. Friar would be hurt considering that they were the biggest support we had during my pregnancy, and I have yet to come and visit with Thomas.

Just as I'm about to turn and walk back to the car, the door slowly opens. "Riley, hi!"

I laugh nervously. "I thought me and Thomas could come visit." I look down at the car seat that I'm holding by the handle and back to Mrs. Friar just in time to see the tugs on her lips as she glimpses at the car seat.

She opens the door as wide as she can and steps to the side making room for me to walk in with Thomas. I look over my shoulder to wave bye to my mom before taking a step inside.

Once we're inside and in the living room, I set the car seat down on the couch, and it takes seconds before Mrs. Friar has Thomas in his arms.

"Grandma has missed you so much," she places a gentle kiss on his forehead.

"I-I don't know if Lucas told that I've been in the city for a few days." I shift uneasily on my feet.

She nods and turns her attention to me. "He did."

My head drops. "I'm sorry it took me so long to bring Thomas over."

She moves closer to me and with her free hand to lift my head. "I knew you'd be over as soon as you were ready." She grins, and I slowly lower myself down to take a seat on the couch.

"I…I think I just needed a moment to breath. I was exhausted, Lucas was stressed with school…and we were overwhelmed being new parents without either of our moms there." Mrs. Friar and I both chuckle.

"It was selfish of me to leave though," I whisper.

"It wasn't selfish, Riley. You were thinking about you and Thomas." She looks down at Thomas and caresses his face. "Lucas told me things got a little heated between the two of you, and this is all new for the two of you. You were doing what you thought was best for you and Thomas, and I'm not mad at you for doing so."

Mrs. Friar looks at me. "You're a new mom, and I wish I could tell you things are only going to be easy from here, but having a baby never is. But, when you feel like things are out of control or anything, don't be afraid to ask for help. You have your parents and you have us. We're here to help, and I'm sure none of us mind spending time with our grandbaby."

I didn't know tears were starting to surface in my eyes until I feel them sliding down my cheeks. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to cry, but I'm…I'm just relieved to hear that. I've been scared to ask for help thinking I had to prove that Lucas and I could do this by ourselves and that us being young parents didn't matter." I wipe at the wetness on my cheeks.

"You and Lucas could most definitely raise Thomas on your own. It'll be hard, but you two can. However, that doesn't mean you need to. You have people that are more than willing to help and want to help, all you have to do is ask."

I let out a shaky breath. "Thank you."

Mrs. Friar grabs my hand giving it a reassuring squeeze. "There isn't a need for that, but you are very welcome."

I excuse myself to the bathroom to try to clean up my face and the little mascara that ran down my cheeks. The one time that I decided to wear makeup in weeks, and I ruin it with my tears. After minutes in the bathroom, I return to the living room only to have my breath caught in my throat.

"Lucas?" I see him flitch at my voice, and I'm not sure it's because he doesn't want to see me or if it's because there was a presence of slight fear in my voice.

He slowly turns to face me, and my eyes instantly find his. I've missed those eyes. "Hi." He speaks so quietly as if he was afraid if he was too loud it would send me running.

"Hey." My voice matches his.

I wait for him to say something, but when he doesn't, the uncomfortable silence that has existed between the two of us for days surrounds us.

"Why don't I give you two a minute? It'll give me more time with Thomas." She holds out her arms taking Thomas from Lucas, and I notice the pain expression on Lucas' face as he separates from Thomas.

Lucas' eyes stay locked on Mrs. Friar and our son as she walks out the room, but my eyes stayed locked him.

Once she is out of sight, Lucas doesn't turn to face me. I think he and I are both scared of what might happen next. We're scared to move—both literal and figurative.

He lets out a deep sigh and sits down on the couch. He doesn't look up. He stares at his hands as he wrings them together, and I can feel my insides turning with fear. Fear that this is it. That he decided that it's the end for us, and he can't bring himself to say it.

I hesitantly take a seat in the open space on the couch, but I make sure to leave a gap between us.

"We need to talk." His voice sends a shiver down my spine. Nothing good ever follows that line. I glance at him and he still hasn't looked up from his hands. "I didn't know you and Thomas were going to be here. I was going to go over after I talked to my mom."

I glance at him before I look at my own hands. "Yeah, she always seems to know what to say."

"Yeah."

There is a silence, the silence that we've been trapped in for days.

"I'm sorry," I manage to whisper and look up just in time to see his head shoots up.

"You're sorry?" His eyes are wide. Of course, I'm sorry. I left. I should have stayed and tried to talk things out between Lucas. Why is he surprised? I can't run away now because now it isn't just going to affect just Lucas and I. We have a son to worry about.

"Riley, you don't have anything to be sorry about. I should have been helping more, and I shouldn't have raised my voice at you especially not while you had Thomas in your arms." He drops his head and runs his hands through his hair, and I can feel my heart aching and tears starting to swell in my eyes.

I slowly move closer to Lucas, and I reach to touch his arm but I pull away. I would have never thought twice about comforting him I would have just done it, so why am I second guessing it?

I try again, but again, I retract my hand. But, I wasn't quick enough. He swiftly grabs my hand and holds it between the two of his. "I am so sorry, Riley."

My eyes meet his, and I want to speak but no words are coming out. "I let you just walk out the front door, and I didn't try to stop you. I let the stress get to me, and I shouldn't have."

"I never should have left." His hold on my hand tightens a little. "I'm sorry for running away like that and taking Thomas with me. I also yelled at you, and I'm sorry. I was just so exhausted and a…a little jealous."

"Jealous?" Lucas questions.

I blink a few times sending a few tears down my cheeks, and I wipe them away with my free hand. "Yes, jealous." I let out a small laugh through my tears, "I was supposed to be starting my first year of college, and I see you going to your classes and, and-"

"You wish it was you," he interrupts me, and I nod my head.

"I know I made the decision to take a gap year, but I felt like there wasn't any other choice. I wanted you to start school, and someone needed to watch the baby. I guess I just snapped." More tears stream down my face, and Lucas uses one of his hands to thumb them away.

"I've been miserable at home without you and Thomas there. It's quiet, and I thought I wanted that but I don't. I love coming home from my classes and seeing Thomas laying on the couch with you hovering over him making funny faces." Lucas and I both laugh, and Lucas brushes a loose strand of hair out of my face and tucks it behind my ear. "I love hearing the apartment filled with the sounds of your voice and coos from Thomas."

Lucas interlocks our fingers. "I should have come sooner, but I was scared of what might happen next between us. But, I know more than ever I want to be with you and our son."

"What if things get too stressful, again?" I ask.

"Then, we'll deal with it. Things are going to get hard. We are going to feel exhausted, frustrated, stressed and feel like we're in over our heads, but we'll get through it. It's not just the two of us that we're fighting for. We have a son. We have Thomas. Sometimes it may not feel like everything is going to be okay, but I promise eventually it will be."

His eyes search mine and I can feel my heart start to quicken. "Right now, I need to know if we're okay." He speaks softly, "Because I want you and Thomas to come home with me. I don't think I can go another day and night without either of you there."

I look down at our intertwined fingers. I know there are going to be roadblocks in the future, and sometimes it might be easier to run away like I did, but I can't. Not when this is exactly where I'm meant to be. "We're okay."

"Good, because I've missed you so much." He presses his forehead against mine.

"I've missed you, too. I don't like how things have been between us."

"Me either." We stay with our foreheads pressed against one another staring into each other's eyes. It's been days since we spoke so freely and says since we've seen each other. I don't want to break the moment just yet.

Lucas slowly leans forward and soon I feel his lips on mine. It's a soft and needy kiss. He lets his lips linger onto mine for a minute before pulling away.

"Can we go steal Thomas away from my mom? Because I've missed him too. I've been staring at the pictures you've sent to me."

I laugh. "We can try, but it might be harder than you think. As soon as I got here, Thomas was in her arms. So, good luck."

We follow down the hall in the direction Mrs. Friar disappeared in with Thomas, and Lucas' arm draped over my shoulders. I've missed this.

"You know, you don't have to wait until next fall. You can always start school next semester. It's months away. Thomas will be older, and I'm sure my mom will be happy to help with the baby when we need her," Lucas says as we get closer to Mrs. Friar study.

"I'd be more than happy." We hear Mrs. Friar shout out, and Lucas grins.

We stop just outside the door of the study. "See, and there are my dad and your parents too. You don't have to wait any longer than necessary to start school. It's going to be difficult, but you never know, the hardest part might just be being away from Thomas all day. Because even though you might be jealous that I'm going to school right now, I'm jealous that you get to spend all day with our baby."

I tilt my head to the side in realization. "I never thought of that. I guess I am pretty lucky."

Lucas smiles. "You are." He kisses my forehead. "Now, I need to get in there. I got to hold him for a minute, and that was not nearly enough." I laugh as he pushes his way inside and stocks over to Mrs. Friar.

With some reluctance, Mrs. Friar hands Thomas over and Lucas' face instantly brightens up and I can feel fluttering in my stomach. Being eighteen and pregnant was definitely not the plan I had for my future, but looking at Lucas and Thomas, I can't picture my future any different.

My little family may have happened too soon, but it's everything that I ever wanted.


End file.
